{"id":173,"date":"2010-02-05T13:32:05","date_gmt":"2010-02-05T17:32:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/?page_id=173"},"modified":"2010-02-05T13:38:03","modified_gmt":"2010-02-05T17:38:03","slug":"173","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/173\/","title":{"rendered":"My Pet Chicken and His Gun"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>This morning, I woke up and looked outside my window.\u00a0 As I looked out upon thousands and thousands of my gorgeous people, I remembered how Kingly and Royal I am.\u00a0 I went to brush my teeth and saw my pet chicken holding my gun.\u00a0 I decided to eat breakfast with my pet snake, Bob.\u00a0 Someone came in and said another nation was attacking.\u00a0 And I was so worried I ate Bob.<\/p>\n<p>I had terrible indigestion.\u00a0 A messenger said that somebody launched a Nuke at the Castle.\u00a0 So I went outside and told my people to wear green feathers for the rest of the year.\u00a0 And then I went back inside and went back to sleep.<\/p>\n<p>Then the Nuke hit and there was a big BOOOOOM, feathers flying.\u00a0 Then I went outside and pooped on the street.\u00a0 Someone asked me why they were wearing green feathers.\u00a0 The person said why not wear orange and blue feathers.\u00a0 I said, &#8220;Um, I don&#8217;t know, green is my favorite color.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Regardless of the fact that Wii didn&#8217;t exist back then, I went inside what was left of my Castle and started playing Madden 10.\u00a0 Someone asked me where I got that and I randomly said that a deer had jumped on the top of the Empire State Building, on the tippy-top of the antenna.<\/p>\n<p>Suddenly someone stepped on my poop and turned it into a cat.\u00a0 And then, suddenly my pet chicken shot everybody in the Kingdom.<\/p>\n<p>THE END<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This morning, I woke up and looked outside my window.\u00a0 As I looked out upon thousands and thousands of my gorgeous people, I remembered how Kingly and Royal I am.\u00a0 I went to brush my teeth and saw my pet chicken holding my gun.\u00a0 I decided to eat breakfast with my pet snake, Bob.\u00a0 Someone [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":32,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-173","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/173","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/32"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=173"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/173\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.dalton.org\/mslibrary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=173"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}